Yes, this is one of those. Another tense look into the author's psyche. I had another dream last night and I want to tell about it.
Sometimes, dreams can be very scary. Dreams about death and bankruptcy fall into this category.
Sometimes, dreams can be very nice. Dreams about life and opportune inheritances and winning lottery tickets fall into this category.
But sometimes, you get a little of both, mixed into a unconscious cocktail of oddity. Last night, I had one of these.
Now, I don't mean to be awkward in any way, and if at any point this post makes you feel that way, please feel free to stop reading. However, last night, I had a kissing dream. I don't remember who the girl was I was kissing, but I do remember that, I, the slumbering dreamer, felt as virile and confident as Arnold Schwarzenegger in Commando. Then, something happened.
She screamed, "UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" And ran away.
I woke up.
Talk about an unexpected plot twist.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Tiredly Busy, Busily Tired
Today has been odd since the very beginning. I remember waking up this morning in a haze. Snow was falling outside my window, which seemed only a continuation of the very odd dreams I experienced during the night, of which I cannot relate because I cannot remember an iota about them except that they were, in fact, odd. I dragged myself to the bathroom and, upon looking at myself and my bloodshot zombie eyes in the mirror, surmised that staying up until 2 a.m. reading One Flew over the Cuckoo's Nest had been a rather poor decision on my part, despite the fact that I had been extremely pleased with the overall quality of the book. However, it seems to me that nowadays I am more and more prone to making such decisions wherein I choose the pleasure of reading over the strange ecstasies of a normal REM cycle.
However, though I took my waking slow (see Theodore Roetke's "The Waking") I soon managed to encourage myself to shake off somewhat the residual fatigue of oblivion and put myself to work being useful in some way. And not just in some way, of course; in the way, the best way of being useful, as far as I am concerned: Making food.
In fact, I become so rapt with making food for dinner and so on that I completely forgot to have breakfast until around 2:00 p.m. Some might argue and say I had lunch then, but I have to disagree because, after all, who has Cheerios for lunch? Not I, said the pig.
Anyway, today I made a whole slew of food, both for dinner tonight and for Sunday when we shall be having family over for dinner. I, first of all, made dinner rolls. About five dozen, in fact. Turned out nicely. Then I made two pans of sour cream potatoes. Also turned out nicely (I know because we had three-quarters of a pan for dinner tonight, along with cheeseburgers, which I made as well). Then I made deviled eggs, which were spectacular. I kept picking in them up until dinner, and then I had some more. By the way, when will someone invent angeled eggs?
In addition, I did a load of laundry and read Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut. It was good, but certainly odd. And I would know, of course, because I felt very odd myself, this entire day. I told you that I shook off the tiredness with which I awoke, but that is more or less a lie. Today was permeated with haziness and awake-walking. I am surprised I did not lose a finger or two as I was slicing eggs because, to tell the truth, I am not exactly sure I knew what I was doing. However, I still have all of my appendages, and dinner was great, even if I can't remember how exactly I got here.
However, though I took my waking slow (see Theodore Roetke's "The Waking") I soon managed to encourage myself to shake off somewhat the residual fatigue of oblivion and put myself to work being useful in some way. And not just in some way, of course; in the way, the best way of being useful, as far as I am concerned: Making food.
In fact, I become so rapt with making food for dinner and so on that I completely forgot to have breakfast until around 2:00 p.m. Some might argue and say I had lunch then, but I have to disagree because, after all, who has Cheerios for lunch? Not I, said the pig.
Anyway, today I made a whole slew of food, both for dinner tonight and for Sunday when we shall be having family over for dinner. I, first of all, made dinner rolls. About five dozen, in fact. Turned out nicely. Then I made two pans of sour cream potatoes. Also turned out nicely (I know because we had three-quarters of a pan for dinner tonight, along with cheeseburgers, which I made as well). Then I made deviled eggs, which were spectacular. I kept picking in them up until dinner, and then I had some more. By the way, when will someone invent angeled eggs?
In addition, I did a load of laundry and read Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut. It was good, but certainly odd. And I would know, of course, because I felt very odd myself, this entire day. I told you that I shook off the tiredness with which I awoke, but that is more or less a lie. Today was permeated with haziness and awake-walking. I am surprised I did not lose a finger or two as I was slicing eggs because, to tell the truth, I am not exactly sure I knew what I was doing. However, I still have all of my appendages, and dinner was great, even if I can't remember how exactly I got here.
Monday, February 21, 2011
Time's a-Changin'
Up until this point, I have been fairly good at keeping up with the grind demanded by this daily blog. I have been able to post (with one or two exceptions) every single day since early November. It has been wonderful for me to share with you, and I have enjoyed the challenge of trying to have something to scribble down, even when ideas are difficult to come by.
Well, it seems that the time to meet that challenge has passed. The desire to keep a daily blog has not been vanquished, no. In fact, I wish I could keep up as I have, but unfortunately it's time for me to face the truth of my position: I have neither the intellectual energy nor the time to continue as I have. If I were somehow a perpetual well of fascinating ideas and catchy witticisms and Johnny-on-the-spot nonsense (which border on outright lies), it might be different; however, I am not exactly as I may appear at times. The well runs dry (as I'm sure we all have experienced), and it requires some time to replenish a barren reservoir, especially a mental one.
Consequently, I will be changing the schedule of my posts from daily to semi-weekly: I shall have a post on Mondays, and one on Thursdays, thus providing me with adequate time, I hope, to somehow wring out some good, solid ideas to share with my readership from my sponge of a brain which is currently yearning for a full bucket.
I appreciate, as always, the continued patronage of my readers, and I hope you will continue to visit my blog in the future. The end is not near, no matter how this post may sound; we are simply entering a new phase our relationship.
Love to you all, and keep the faith, my friends, "for my purpose holds to sail beyond the sunset....Though much is taken, much abides" (from Alfred Lord Tennyson's "Ulysses").
Well, it seems that the time to meet that challenge has passed. The desire to keep a daily blog has not been vanquished, no. In fact, I wish I could keep up as I have, but unfortunately it's time for me to face the truth of my position: I have neither the intellectual energy nor the time to continue as I have. If I were somehow a perpetual well of fascinating ideas and catchy witticisms and Johnny-on-the-spot nonsense (which border on outright lies), it might be different; however, I am not exactly as I may appear at times. The well runs dry (as I'm sure we all have experienced), and it requires some time to replenish a barren reservoir, especially a mental one.
Consequently, I will be changing the schedule of my posts from daily to semi-weekly: I shall have a post on Mondays, and one on Thursdays, thus providing me with adequate time, I hope, to somehow wring out some good, solid ideas to share with my readership from my sponge of a brain which is currently yearning for a full bucket.
I appreciate, as always, the continued patronage of my readers, and I hope you will continue to visit my blog in the future. The end is not near, no matter how this post may sound; we are simply entering a new phase our relationship.
Love to you all, and keep the faith, my friends, "for my purpose holds to sail beyond the sunset....Though much is taken, much abides" (from Alfred Lord Tennyson's "Ulysses").
Sunday, February 20, 2011
"Sunday, Bloody Sunday"
I tried a new tactic with the children in my Primary class today. Instead of giving them cookies or sugary treats, I gave them rolls (I made them myself last night), thinking that something healthy might be good for them, as well as keeping them from having a sugar fix during the lesson.
It didn't work.
In fact, they behaved worse than they ever have before in class. I think I may just go back to giving them cookies and fruit snacks in exchange for good behavior. That'll keep 'em in line.
Maybe.
Just as a side note: One of the speakers in church today said the word perfect in his discourse at least 43 times (that's where I lost count), utilizing that term anywhere from 3-10 instances in a single sentence. I think he really wants us to try and be perfect.
Possibly. Unless I missed the point. Wouldn't that be just perfect?
It didn't work.
In fact, they behaved worse than they ever have before in class. I think I may just go back to giving them cookies and fruit snacks in exchange for good behavior. That'll keep 'em in line.
Maybe.
Just as a side note: One of the speakers in church today said the word perfect in his discourse at least 43 times (that's where I lost count), utilizing that term anywhere from 3-10 instances in a single sentence. I think he really wants us to try and be perfect.
Possibly. Unless I missed the point. Wouldn't that be just perfect?
Saturday, February 19, 2011
False Advertising
How is it that so many businesses continue to create commercials which, while putting their company in a better light, falsely depict their products as having a certain effect or possessing a certain appearance? In fact, I'm fairly sure that one cannot watch TV for more than a few seconds without coming across an advertisement that does not bend, stretch, or otherwise disfigure the truth (if not out-and-out breaking it in little pieces, swallowing it, and regurgitating it like a mama robin feeding her young).
For example, Macdonald's food, in reality, looks nothing like it does in the commercial world. Some might even consider the advertised food something of a simulacra, a supposed copy of a copy of something for which there is actually no original (see Jean Baudrillard's Simulacra and Simulacrum). If Macdonald's actuall served burgers that looked like burgers (as advertised) then I would have no qualms about eating there at all. As it is however, I refuse to sample their burgers anymore because their burgers are as greasy as a used-car salesman and as thin as a bolemic crack addict.
Or how about those Axe commercials? I have used Axe body spray in the past, but it didn't work the way the commercials said it would. I have never been chased down a beach by thousands of bikini-clad women coming from every direction; I have never had a woman catch a whiff of my Axe body wash and suddenly start saying "Boom chicka wow wow!" and try to rip my clothing off; and I have never gotten hair-action at a party (or anywhere else for that matter). D--- you, Axe, you're full of it.
Movie trailers are the same. In less than a minute of edited clips, a movie trailer can convince an audience that the movie they're going to see is actually pretty good. Then, once in the movie theater, the viewers find out that they had already seen every good scene that the movie had to offer (see Talladega Nights).
Remember the old commercials for York peppermints patties? The people who took a bite would immediately receive the sensation that they were playing hockey in the kitchen or doing the luge down a mountain slope in their recliner "as the wind whips against [their] body!" But I guess it only works for them because when I bite into a York peppermint patty I get the sensation that I'm...biting into a York peppermint patty. No more. No less.
Also, if Doublemint gum really did double your pleasure and double your fun as the advertisements say it does, it would probably sit next to the KY Jelly instead of in the checkout line opposite the tabloids and Soap Opera Guides.
So, how do we fix this? Well, it cannot be fixed. The people who are trying to sell crappy products will ultimately fail if they come out and tell their customers how bad their merchandise is, and those who sell better things than their competition have nothing at all to fix. Further, those whose merchandise is only about as good as the rest of the competitors' (such as Axe) will have to continue trying to find ways to make themselves stand out, even if it means making things up. Therefore, we will continue to exist as we have always existed: being let down by crappy movies whose trailers are better than the real thing; finding more delight in watching commercials about food than actually eating it; and waiting forever for hair action that will never, ever, come.
For example, Macdonald's food, in reality, looks nothing like it does in the commercial world. Some might even consider the advertised food something of a simulacra, a supposed copy of a copy of something for which there is actually no original (see Jean Baudrillard's Simulacra and Simulacrum). If Macdonald's actuall served burgers that looked like burgers (as advertised) then I would have no qualms about eating there at all. As it is however, I refuse to sample their burgers anymore because their burgers are as greasy as a used-car salesman and as thin as a bolemic crack addict.
Or how about those Axe commercials? I have used Axe body spray in the past, but it didn't work the way the commercials said it would. I have never been chased down a beach by thousands of bikini-clad women coming from every direction; I have never had a woman catch a whiff of my Axe body wash and suddenly start saying "Boom chicka wow wow!" and try to rip my clothing off; and I have never gotten hair-action at a party (or anywhere else for that matter). D--- you, Axe, you're full of it.
Movie trailers are the same. In less than a minute of edited clips, a movie trailer can convince an audience that the movie they're going to see is actually pretty good. Then, once in the movie theater, the viewers find out that they had already seen every good scene that the movie had to offer (see Talladega Nights).
Remember the old commercials for York peppermints patties? The people who took a bite would immediately receive the sensation that they were playing hockey in the kitchen or doing the luge down a mountain slope in their recliner "as the wind whips against [their] body!" But I guess it only works for them because when I bite into a York peppermint patty I get the sensation that I'm...biting into a York peppermint patty. No more. No less.
Also, if Doublemint gum really did double your pleasure and double your fun as the advertisements say it does, it would probably sit next to the KY Jelly instead of in the checkout line opposite the tabloids and Soap Opera Guides.
So, how do we fix this? Well, it cannot be fixed. The people who are trying to sell crappy products will ultimately fail if they come out and tell their customers how bad their merchandise is, and those who sell better things than their competition have nothing at all to fix. Further, those whose merchandise is only about as good as the rest of the competitors' (such as Axe) will have to continue trying to find ways to make themselves stand out, even if it means making things up. Therefore, we will continue to exist as we have always existed: being let down by crappy movies whose trailers are better than the real thing; finding more delight in watching commercials about food than actually eating it; and waiting forever for hair action that will never, ever, come.
Mistake
I messed up today. Oops.
Substitute-teaching was unfortunately rather trying and stressful on account of certain naughty eighth-graders and the weird Career Day schedule at the middle school. Children were hyper and keyed-up over that, not to mention my over-enthusiastic (which is just a big word for rowdy and obnoxious) students seemed intent on making me pay for my intrusion into their lives, as well as coming between them and their four-day weekend. Needless to say, I was fried by the time I made it home today. So, as I said before, I messed up.
I took a nap.
At 4:30 p.m. Nice move, I know, but I simply couldn't help it.
Consequently, I am up later tonight than I had wanted to be. I would have gone to bed a couple of hours ago, if only I had been tired. Of course, it isn't only the fact that I took a nap which is keeping me up. It's also the fact that I had a craving for ice cream and cookies at 11:00 p.m. I even added some chocolate truffles, but then I decided it was too nasty and junky, so I cut up half a banana to go with it. Made it much healthier, of course, and soothed my conscience. It also infused my body with enough sugar to keep me going for a fortnight without blinking, and since then I have been sitting on the couch reading Go Tell It on the Mountain by James Baldwin and watching old episodes of Newsradio (I just finished the second season). D--- those late night cravings and occasional weakness for vanilla ice cream. Sometimes, I'm just tempted above that which I am able, I guess (and yes, I know that is not in keeping with biblical teaching, but it sure feels that way sometimes). Another truffle or two, and I probably would have gone into a diabetic coma; the bright side of that would have been the fact that I at least would be sleeping right now. The dark side: you would not have a new blog post to read today (Did you think I was going to say being in a diabetic coma?). Anyway, when it does wear off, I hope no one wakes me up until Monday; otherwise, I might get angry. You won't like me when I'm angry (Note: I will wake up for about three hours on Sunday for church, but directly after I will come home and go immediately back to bed; I have learned my lesson about late-night snacking and sugar intake. At least for a while).
Substitute-teaching was unfortunately rather trying and stressful on account of certain naughty eighth-graders and the weird Career Day schedule at the middle school. Children were hyper and keyed-up over that, not to mention my over-enthusiastic (which is just a big word for rowdy and obnoxious) students seemed intent on making me pay for my intrusion into their lives, as well as coming between them and their four-day weekend. Needless to say, I was fried by the time I made it home today. So, as I said before, I messed up.
I took a nap.
At 4:30 p.m. Nice move, I know, but I simply couldn't help it.
Consequently, I am up later tonight than I had wanted to be. I would have gone to bed a couple of hours ago, if only I had been tired. Of course, it isn't only the fact that I took a nap which is keeping me up. It's also the fact that I had a craving for ice cream and cookies at 11:00 p.m. I even added some chocolate truffles, but then I decided it was too nasty and junky, so I cut up half a banana to go with it. Made it much healthier, of course, and soothed my conscience. It also infused my body with enough sugar to keep me going for a fortnight without blinking, and since then I have been sitting on the couch reading Go Tell It on the Mountain by James Baldwin and watching old episodes of Newsradio (I just finished the second season). D--- those late night cravings and occasional weakness for vanilla ice cream. Sometimes, I'm just tempted above that which I am able, I guess (and yes, I know that is not in keeping with biblical teaching, but it sure feels that way sometimes). Another truffle or two, and I probably would have gone into a diabetic coma; the bright side of that would have been the fact that I at least would be sleeping right now. The dark side: you would not have a new blog post to read today (Did you think I was going to say being in a diabetic coma?). Anyway, when it does wear off, I hope no one wakes me up until Monday; otherwise, I might get angry. You won't like me when I'm angry (Note: I will wake up for about three hours on Sunday for church, but directly after I will come home and go immediately back to bed; I have learned my lesson about late-night snacking and sugar intake. At least for a while).
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Books I Have Read (or Started Reading or Re-read) in the Last Month (and How I Liked Them)
I would like to give an in-detail rundown of all the books I've read recently, but unfortunately the sheer volume of this task would make an extremely long and laborious post. Therefore, I shall have to be content (as will you) with a shortened list and abbreviated review of each of the books I have read in the last month, beginning with some of the most recent.
The Red Badge of Courage by Stephen Crane
Review: A wonderful little novel that entails blow-by-blow the internal struggle of a young soldier during his first encounters with tragedy and death in the Civil War. Five stars out of four (and yes, I did that on purpose).
The Death of Ivan Ilyich by Leo Tolstoy
Review: Chronicles the thoughts and emotional turmoil of a Russian judge as he contemplates death, the events which led to it, and the way in which he spent his life. Ultimately, Tolstoy does an outstanding job of pin-pointing different facets of this dying man's attempts to cope with his own impending death. Unfortunately, the lack of dialogue in the story make this short novel seem much longer; however, that does not diminish its essential masterful qualities. Four stars out of four.
The Tao of Pooh by Benjamin Hoff
Review: A silly little rundown of instances in which the Bear of Very Little Brain and his friends demonstrate the nuances and idiosyncrasies of Western society and Eastern philosophy. Four stars out of four.
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
Review: Apart from all of the swearing, drinking, smoking, and other naughty things which Holden Caulfield engages in, this book is quite well done. Now, reader who are sensitive to such things can do either of two things: Open your mind and look past Holden's bad qualities in order to enjoy the story, or do not read the book at all. I, for one, being of the former inclination, choose to enjoy the story and the interesting intricacies of Holden's anti-hero persona. Four stars out of four.
The Time Machine by H.G. Wells
Review: For me, this story, though probably very ingenious and imaginative for the time in which it was written, seems only to be a washed-up replica of Jules Verne-like genius. Worse still, Wells seems to focus more on didacticism and propagandization of current trends than telling a story which further detracts from what might have been a more interesting tale. One star out of four.
Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes
Review: Don Quixote de la Mancha is one of my favorite literary figures because his mania for chivalric codes and living out his dream of being a knight presents a wonderful contrast with the people who wish to prevent his sallyings-forth and burn his heretical books of knight-errantry. The question thereby presented is this: Even if it is lunacy to consider oneself a knight when indeed one is not, is it worse than being intolerant and judgmental? It is certainly not a book that all will enjoy because it does tend to become long-winded and dry in places, but I still give it four unreachable stars out of four.
The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
Review: A very short novel, much is packed into its tiny confines. While not everyone's cup of tea, the actions of some of the characters will infuriate anyone. Therefore, if you like the sort of book which will illicit a very real emotional response, this one is a must-read. Three stars out of four.
As I Lay Dying by Willliam Faulkner
Review: I will say the same for this book. The shifting viewpoints creates quite a bit of confusion for the reader, but the anger which one will feel at the end will make up for any inconvenience caused by Faulkner chosen approach to this story. Or mostly make up for it, anyway. Three stars out of four.
Harry Potter volumes 1-7
Review: Each book is better and more engaging than the one before it. As I reached the end, I could not stop reading for the life of me. Five stars out of four.
The Red Badge of Courage by Stephen Crane
Review: A wonderful little novel that entails blow-by-blow the internal struggle of a young soldier during his first encounters with tragedy and death in the Civil War. Five stars out of four (and yes, I did that on purpose).
The Death of Ivan Ilyich by Leo Tolstoy
Review: Chronicles the thoughts and emotional turmoil of a Russian judge as he contemplates death, the events which led to it, and the way in which he spent his life. Ultimately, Tolstoy does an outstanding job of pin-pointing different facets of this dying man's attempts to cope with his own impending death. Unfortunately, the lack of dialogue in the story make this short novel seem much longer; however, that does not diminish its essential masterful qualities. Four stars out of four.
The Tao of Pooh by Benjamin Hoff
Review: A silly little rundown of instances in which the Bear of Very Little Brain and his friends demonstrate the nuances and idiosyncrasies of Western society and Eastern philosophy. Four stars out of four.
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
Review: Apart from all of the swearing, drinking, smoking, and other naughty things which Holden Caulfield engages in, this book is quite well done. Now, reader who are sensitive to such things can do either of two things: Open your mind and look past Holden's bad qualities in order to enjoy the story, or do not read the book at all. I, for one, being of the former inclination, choose to enjoy the story and the interesting intricacies of Holden's anti-hero persona. Four stars out of four.
The Time Machine by H.G. Wells
Review: For me, this story, though probably very ingenious and imaginative for the time in which it was written, seems only to be a washed-up replica of Jules Verne-like genius. Worse still, Wells seems to focus more on didacticism and propagandization of current trends than telling a story which further detracts from what might have been a more interesting tale. One star out of four.
Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes
Review: Don Quixote de la Mancha is one of my favorite literary figures because his mania for chivalric codes and living out his dream of being a knight presents a wonderful contrast with the people who wish to prevent his sallyings-forth and burn his heretical books of knight-errantry. The question thereby presented is this: Even if it is lunacy to consider oneself a knight when indeed one is not, is it worse than being intolerant and judgmental? It is certainly not a book that all will enjoy because it does tend to become long-winded and dry in places, but I still give it four unreachable stars out of four.
The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
Review: A very short novel, much is packed into its tiny confines. While not everyone's cup of tea, the actions of some of the characters will infuriate anyone. Therefore, if you like the sort of book which will illicit a very real emotional response, this one is a must-read. Three stars out of four.
As I Lay Dying by Willliam Faulkner
Review: I will say the same for this book. The shifting viewpoints creates quite a bit of confusion for the reader, but the anger which one will feel at the end will make up for any inconvenience caused by Faulkner chosen approach to this story. Or mostly make up for it, anyway. Three stars out of four.
Harry Potter volumes 1-7
Review: Each book is better and more engaging than the one before it. As I reached the end, I could not stop reading for the life of me. Five stars out of four.
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