Just so you all know, this is my 21st post. Therefore, according to what I've heard, I have written in my blog enough days in a row that I can now call it a habit. I guess if you do something 16-21 times, it becomes a habit; at least, that's what they say.
Today, I have posted a short story I wrote a while back. Let me know what you think.
Collateral
DING DONG! DING DONG!
Hurriedly, Dad told me finish my cereal and went to answer the front door. He opened it and there stood our next-door neighbor Mr. Parken.
“Hey, John, how you doing? What can I do for you?”
Mr. Parken replied, “I need to ask a favor. I’ve got a tree in my backyard that needs to come down, and if I don’t take care of it now, it’s gonna fall on someone. Can I borrow your chainsaw?”
Dad sighed and thought for a second.
“You know my wife’s rule. I’m going to need to see some collateral to make sure you bring it back.”
“I know, I know. And that’s why I brought Jimmy with me.”
The little boy peeked out from behind his father’s leg.
“You’re leaving Jimmy for collateral? I’ve had your Olivia for three weeks now because you haven’t brought my leaf blower back. Now you want to give me Jimmy, too?”
“I’ll take him back later today. And I broke the leaf blower, so it’s in the shop right now getting fixed. I’ll come by with it and pick up Olivia tomorrow.”
“Fine, but I can’t take anymore of your kids until you bring my other things back. Got it?”
Jimmy came in the house, Mr. Parken took the chainsaw, and everything was settled. For five minutes.
DING DONG! DING DONG!
“Zeke, can you get that?” Dad yelled to me.
“Me and Jimmy are busy.”
Mumbling to himself, Dad answered the door again.
“John, you’re back already? Decided not to leave Jimmy after all?”
“Actually no. The chainsaw doesn’t have any gas, so I’m going to need a refill. Do you have any?”
“Uh, sure, but you’ll need to get me some more.”
“Sure, sure, I understand. Look, I’m leaving little Cindy with you to make sure I buy you some more gas. Sound good?”
Dad groaned.
“Cindy’s a year old. I’ve already got two of your kids. There’s no way I can take her. Don’t you have anything else to leave?”
“Well, I can leave my wife, Mallory, with you. She’s extremely quiet, and she’ll just sit around and crochet and do crossword puzzles. She may even fix lunch for you and the kids.”
“But who’ll watch Cindy?”
“Good point. I’d have to leave both of ‘em.”
“C’mon, John. I can’t take your wife. What would mine say?”
“She won’t be here that long. I’ll come get most of ‘em in a couple of hours.”
“Alright, John. But this is the last time.”
“Deal.”
Dad was a pushover. That’s why Mom made the rule in the first place. Dad was too nice to make people bring his tools back, so Mom made sure they left something. In fact, that was the last thing she said to him before she left on her business trip: “If people have to borrow something from us, make them leave something valuable with you. Otherwise we’ll never see our things again. Got it?” She’d been out of the country for a month now, meeting people in Japan , Hong Kong , India , and Korea
For Dad, the rest of the day was spent watching the clock. Around five, Mr. Parken showed up with the leaf blower, a suitcase, and a diaper bag.
“Your leaf blower is fixed. I can take Olivia back now. These things,” he said, handing the suitcase and the diaper bag to my dad, “are for Mallory and Cindy.”
“Aren’t you going to take them all back now?”
“Well, I haven’t gotten to the gas station yet, so the wife and Cindy will have to stay. The tree is a bit more stubborn than I thought it would be, so I’ll have to work on it some more tonight. I’ll come and get Jimmy tomorrow morning around eleven.”
“But my wife will be back before nine. I can’t have your wife sitting around in her pajamas on my couch when my wife gets home.”
“Why not? She’ll understand. She always does.”
“I don’t think she will this time.”
“Don’t worry about it. It’ll be okay.”
It wouldn’t be. But Dad had to stick to the rules.
The next morning, Mr. Parken showed up at eight, much to my Dad’s delight.
“I’ll take my family now. Here’s the chainsaw and here’s the gas. Thanks for helping me out.”
It took Mrs. Parken just a second to pack herself and the baby and Jimmy and head out the door.
“Oh, one more thing, John.”
“Yes?”
“If you ever need anything else, please ask someone else.”
“Deal.”
An hour later, Mom came home. She was irritable and tired and ready to just fall into bed after her seventeen-hour flight from Calcutta
“Hey, everyone. I’m home.”
We both ran and hugged her. I was glad to have her back. So was Dad. Until Mom found some of Mrs. Parken’s panties hanging over the shower rod.
“What are these doing here?”
Dad was speechless.
“They’re Mrs. Parken’s,” I answered.
Her eyes widened. I could almost smell the brimstone in her perfume.
“What was Mrs. Parken doing here, sweetie?” she said to my dad, venomously.
Dad still couldn’t speak.
Seeing that Dad still couldn’t or wouldn’t say anything, I replied for him.
“Oh, she just slept here last night. So did…”
Then her claws came out.
“What were you thinking? I’ve been off for a month trying to support our family and you have some tramp sleeping over here while I’m gone? You good-for-nothing pig….”
Suddenly, my dad grabbed the panties, took my hand, walked out the door with me, and slammed the door behind us. I could still hear my mom’s threats about divorce and lawyers as we crossed the lawn.
We quickly walked over to the Parkens’ house and rang the door.
DING DONG! DING DONG!
Mr. Parken answered.
“Hey, what are you doing here?” he asked. “Didn’t return everything?”
“Yeah, well, um, your wife left these,” Dad stuttered, handing him the underwear.
“Oh, yikes. Hope your wife didn’t see those,” Mr. Parken said with a nervous laugh. “Could be trouble.”
“Yeah, well about that. Zeke here needs to borrow something for a couple of days.”
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